DON’T HURT YOURSELF: your week 6 playlist

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Songs about cheaters.

THE SMITHS – “Stop Me If You Think You’ve Heard This One Before” – as described by annabel ostrow

For when a string of bad excuses seems just slightly better than Shaggy’s “it wasn’t me”

LILY ALLEN – “Smile” – zane hellmann

There are some feelings that require another language to express. You have to love the Germans for coming up with a word as perfect as “schadenfreude,” which means “to take pleasure in other people’s pain.” Lily Allen’s “Smile” is the melodic and lyrical embodiment of this amazing word. So, for those that have been jilted or cheated on, pump up the Lily Allen, hum along, know that karma is on your side, and smile your way into a new relationship with someone who deserves you.

DOLLY PARTON – “Traveling Man” – as described by carlos valladares

Don’t ya just hate it when Mama goes messin’ ’round with your man? Dolly does.

SAM SMITH – “I’m Not The Only One” – as described by elisabeth dee

This song gets me right in the feels – the crooning, repetitive simplicity makes me tear up every time. Also, the music video itself is great. I could watch Dianna Agron lose her shit completely over and over. Yas bitch burn it down.

CHAIRLIFT – “Sidewalk Safari” – as described by zhanpei fang

Not specifically about cheating, but Caroline Polachek sings about her intention to carry out “manic revenge” (from the band’s website) on an ex via vehicular assault; strange, dreamy, and dangerous.

THE CAST OF HAMILTON – “The Reynolds Pamphlet” – as described by chloe rickards

The shenanigans of our “ten dollar founding father without a father” caught the public eye long before he became the subject of the hit Broadway musical that you hum along to on the way to class, whether you’re obsessed with the show or not.  Alexander Hamilton’s affair with Maria Reynolds marked America’s first political sex scandal.  The musical beautifully weaves together the different points of view surrounding the affair – from Hamilton’s drive in “Hurricane,” to Eliza’s despair in “Burn,” to the public’s uproar in “The Reynolds Pamphlet.”  Dayum.

MELANIE MARTINEZ – “Pacify Her” – as described by sophia laurenzi

Melanie Martinez’s music sounds like Lana del Rey and Lolita making a candy-themed cooking show for children. But there’s no sugar coating on the words “That basic bitch leaves finally/Now I can take her man”, other than her consistently syrupy vocals. Even dolls can drink, be depressed, and steal your man.

ADELE – “Turning Tables” – as described by loralee sepsey

This song isn’t technically about cheating, but it got me through a particularly bad breakup in which my partner cheated on me. Real talk y’all, cheaters are just gonna keep making excuses to stay with you, and you need this FANTASTIC power ballad to clear your head… This song gave me the strength to move on and the empowerment to find something new. Fluffy cats + poutine + someone who actually loves and respects you = happiness. Never forget that.

FLEETWOOD MAC – “Landslide” — as described by nikki tran

This isn’t the kind of post-breakup banger that works you up until you burn the pics. Instead, here, betrayal slowly eats away at you. There are all sorts of theories and interpretations of the meaning of “Landslide,” but for me, it’s a song not only about cheating, but also a song where you are the rogue, where you cheat on yourself, where you’ve let yourself down. It’s fitting that the username of the person who uploaded this video is: “EmoNinjaVampireWolf.” Ready yourself for claws, for cries. 

DRAKE – “Marvins Room” – as described by anthony milki

Wavy, atmospheric, sappy. This week more than ever we need some throwback Drake.

FIONA APPLE – “Criminal” – as described by katie nesser

Bad Gal FiFi has cheated on her dude, but she feels like, really bad about it. So she sings him this apology-by-way-of-seduction, and looks so good doing it, I’d forgive her for anything.

Image from here

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